Funeral!

December 12th “D” day , I had to go to the funeral home right away to get things started. What an emotional ride to leave you dead mother to now go to plan her funeral. I get there and of course my gma is there and for some reason (well I know why) I was so angry at her (my grandmother) I was furious because of the things she was saying at that time. My mother always said she wanted to be creamated and I wanted to fulfill her wishes but I also wanted her to have the best home going possible. My grandmother on the other hand wanted the cheapest way out and be done with it. 🤔 this is your daughter right? Smh. Before the undertaker could even open his mouth with packages the first thing that came out of her mouth was “I don’t have any money” . Ok that’s fine know one asked you for that, because I’m her daughter so according to the law I am responsible, however that was uncalled for. I remember my mom taking out a policy , where that policy and the amount, was unknown. I picked what I wanted and went home, my cousin , husband and family friend helped to find the policy and we were good. However the policy was good but it wasn’t enough to cover all the cost. Now this is Christmas season, I have the kids that my mom loved so so much to think of and also my mom. I needed to find a way to help with tha cost and someone told me about a gofundme. Being that my grandmother wasn’t helping I had no other choice. So all I needed was $650 and thank God people really donated and I was grateful and blessed. I put the rest of the money. I didn’t feel right asking for so much so i just asked for just a little help. God helped with the rest. Now it was time to find her outfit, wig, flowers and all other stuff and of course I had to clean her room for family. It was a mess. All of her stuff in one room was crazy she had so much stuff lol. I found pictures, and what nots and all of the little things that were funny to me, she was a trip. Church folks came that night and like I said before I was so angry at everything. But what really set it off was when the church folks came, my grandmother is there her usual self dramatic and all. And everyone is all over her which is to be expected but what about me? I’m her daughter her only daughter. But what got the fire going was as the church folks are in the house talking to grandma she says ” well Shannon is really my daughter I raised her and adopted her so Cassie is really her sister” they looked at her like know this lady didn’t. I was red my husband had to carry me upstairs so I wouldn’t snap. Who does that? Regardless if you raised me or adopted me doesn’t mean she isn’t my mother, you just helped me stay out the system. But anyway the church folks were in shock that my grandmother went there. Also she was mad that she had no say yet she didn’t want to help anyway. So I decided to have the funeral on December 19th , the pastor of the church didn’t want to give me an evening slot and only wanted me to have it in the morning. I really didn’t want to have a morning service because I felt that it wouldn’t be a big turnout because people work. People are more likely to come in the evening after work. So some church folks worked it out so that I could change the time but of course with a price. The pastor basically told me that yea you can have it in the evening by here are my conditions. You must start at this time, one viewing so once the casket was closed he will not reopen it one last time. I said ok not a problem. Funny because my grandmother has gone to that church since 1958 but who am I. Anyway, I took it and moved on. This time was not the best time and you actually see who is by your side including family. I have def cut friends off and actually family off! It’s funny how you see people true intentions at a wedding and a funeral. Laying my mom to rest was the hardest thing to do. She is no longer physically here and that’s what sucks. What really sucks is the insensitive words that were shot at me during this time. Stay tuned for more.

8 thoughts on “Funeral!

  1. Wow, Shannon! Your Mom was so lucky to have you as her daughter. Your love, your determination. I’m so sorry that it had to be such a struggle in the end. And along the way, for that matter. But I truly believe that we find our happiness because of our suffering. I love you, Shannon!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m really glad that you had people around you who could help you through that difficult time. It is ashamed that it takes a situation such as this one to know who you can count on. Just focus on the positive. Stay away from the negative and know that God is with you through it all. Love you girl 😘

    Liked by 1 person

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