Good morning all!
It has been a long time since I Blessed y’all with a post . A lot has happened within the past few months but I will fill you all in later.
I don’t know if y’all know but I have been struggling with my weight for about 9 years(officially ). It has been a very hard journey and nothing has happened to solve this issue. I have children my first child I was very young and the weight did come off some but not to what I was before her. At that time I could still recognized myself. And I was cool with that. Years after I got engaged and started planning our wedding. Things were ok at first.I got my dress and it was falling off of me which was so great. But that’s when things changed. I was stressed trying to make things right and that’s when I realized I was an emotional eater. Some women lose weight when stressed and some gain. Well I gained and when I say I gained I mean when it was time for my fittings they didn’t have to take in much at all. I pretty much filled into the dress. So this was the beginning of my downfall. We had our son and the pregnancy went well, however I was gaining weight . When I gave birth I had postpartum depression. Having my son I was so happy he is my pride and joy however I felt alone. Some people do t understand postpartum, they don’t get it until they go through it themselves. I came down a little with the eight but I have been in that weight zone going on 9 years now. The weight has not come off and I feel myself stretching . My clothes don’t fit right I don’t like shopping g for clothes because i know they won’t look the way I want them too. Skinny people irritate me lol. It’s a whole mess .
People say the dumbest shit like how can you feel alone when you have a husband and kids and a home and a dog? Or they would say you nothing to be down or stressed about! Yea ok just because someone has the “American dream family” doesn’t mean your life is glitter and gold. Life period will fuck you up period.
But what I had to find was myself inside of me. Finding that place inside of me that motivated me to be and do better . To feel better because you can’t feel better if you don’t motivate yourself to feel better. I always care about things that I shouldn’t care about. Letting small stuff get me down . You gotta be strong and fight the fight of health and wealth. If I want to live I need to act like I want to live instead of feeding myself like I want to die. And that’s how you find yourself within yourself fighting for your life to live ! Be free